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1Meanwhile, councils went on in the kitchen at home, fraught with almost insupportable aggravation to my exasperated
2spirit. That ass, Pumblechook, used often to come over of a night for the purpose of discussing my prospects with my
3sister; and I really do believe (to this hour with less penitence than I ought to feel), that if these hands could have
4taken a linchpin out of his chaise-cart, they would have done it. The miserable man was a man of that confined stolidity
5of mind, that he could not discuss my prospects without having me before him,--as it were, to operate upon,--and he
6would drag me up from my stool (usually by the collar) where I was quiet in a corner, and, putting me before the fire as
7if I were going to be cooked, would begin by saying, "Now, Mum, here is this boy! Here is this boy which you brought up
8by hand. Hold up your head, boy, and be forever grateful unto them which so did do. Now, Mum, with respections to this
9boy!" And then he would rumple my hair the wrong way,--which from my earliest remembrance, as already hinted, I have in
10my soul denied the right of any fellow-creature to do,--and would hold me before him by the sleeve,--a spectacle of
11imbecility only to be equalled by himself. Then, he and my sister would pair off in such nonsensical speculations about
12Miss Havisham, and about what she would do with me and for me, that I used to want--quite painfully--to burst into
13spiteful tears, fly at Pumblechook, and pummel him all over. In these dialogues, my sister spoke to me as if she were
14morally wrenching one of my teeth out at every reference; while Pumblechook himself, self-constituted my patron, would
15sit supervising me with a depreciatory eye, like the architect of my fortunes who thought himself engaged on a very
16unremunerative job. In these discussions, Joe bore no part. But he was often talked at, while they were in progress, by
17reason of Mrs. Joe's perceiving that he was not favourable to my being taken from the forge. I was fully old enough now
18to be apprenticed to Joe; and when Joe sat with the poker on his knees thoughtfully raking out the ashes between the
19lower bars, my sister would so distinctly construe that innocent action into opposition on his part, that she would dive
20at him, take the poker out of his hands, shake him, and put it away. There was a most irritating end to every one of
21these debates. All in a moment, with nothing to lead up to it, my sister would stop herself in a yawn, and catching
22sight of me as it were incidentally, would swoop upon me with, "Come! there's enough of you! You get along to bed;
23you've given trouble enough for one night, I hope!" As if I had besought them as a favour to bother my life out. We went
24on in this way for a long time, and it seemed likely that we should continue to go on in this way for a long time, when
25one day Miss Havisham stopped short as she and I were walking, she leaning on my shoulder; and said with some
26displeasure,-- "You are growing tall, Pip!" I thought it best to hint, through the medium of a meditative look, that
27this might be occasioned by circumstances over which I had no control. She said no more at the time; but she presently
28stopped and looked at me again; and presently again; and after that, looked frowning and moody. On the next day of my
29attendance, when our usual exercise was over, and I had landed her at her dressing-table, she stayed me with a movement
30of her impatient fingers:-- "Tell me the name again of that blacksmith of yours." "Joe Gargery, ma'am." "Meaning the
31master you were to be apprenticed to?" "Yes, Miss Havisham." "You had better be apprenticed at once. Would Gargery come
32here with you, and bring your indentures, do you think?" I signified that I had no doubt he would take it as an honour
33to be asked. "Then let him come." "At any particular time, Miss Havisham?" "There, there! I know nothing about times.
34Let him come soon, and come along with you." When I got home at night, and delivered this message for Joe, my sister
35"went on the Rampage," in a more alarming degree than at any previous period. She asked me and Joe whether we supposed
36she was door-mats under our feet, and how we dared to use her so, and what company we graciously thought she was fit
37for? When she had exhausted a torrent of such inquiries, she threw a candlestick at Joe, burst into a loud sobbing, got
38out the dustpan,--which was always a very bad sign,--put on her coarse apron, and began cleaning up to a terrible
39extent. Not satisfied with a dry cleaning, she took to a pail and scrubbing-brush, and cleaned us out of house and home,
40so that we stood shivering in the back-yard. It was ten o'clock at night before we ventured to creep in again, and then
41she asked Joe why he hadn't married a Negress Slave at once? Joe offered no answer, poor fellow, but stood feeling his
42whisker and looking dejectedly at me, as if he thought it really might have been a better speculation.
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