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1"Oxford! there is no drinking at Oxford now, I assure you. Nobody drinks there. You would hardly meet with a man who
2goes beyond his four pints at the utmost. Now, for instance, it was reckoned a remarkable thing, at the last party in my
3rooms, that upon an average we cleared about five pints a head. It was looked upon as something out of the common way.
4Mine is famous good stuff, to be sure. You would not often meet with anything like it in Oxford--and that may account
5for it. But this will just give you a notion of the general rate of drinking there." "Yes, it does give a notion," said
6Catherine warmly, "and that is, that you all drink a great deal more wine than I thought you did. However, I am sure
7James does not drink so much." This declaration brought on a loud and overpowering reply, of which no part was very
8distinct, except the frequent exclamations, amounting almost to oaths, which adorned it, and Catherine was left, when it
9ended, with rather a strengthened belief of there being a great deal of wine drunk in Oxford, and the same happy
10conviction of her brother's comparative sobriety. Thorpe's ideas then all reverted to the merits of his own equipage,
11and she was called on to admire the spirit and freedom with which his horse moved along, and the ease which his paces,
12as well as the excellence of the springs, gave the motion of the carriage. She followed him in all his admiration as
13well as she could. To go before or beyond him was impossible. His knowledge and her ignorance of the subject, his
14rapidity of expression, and her diffidence of herself put that out of her power; she could strike out nothing new in
15commendation, but she readily echoed whatever he chose to assert, and it was finally settled between them without any
16difficulty that his equipage was altogether the most complete of its kind in England, his carriage the neatest, his
17horse the best goer, and himself the best coachman. "You do not really think, Mr. Thorpe," said Catherine, venturing
18after some time to consider the matter as entirely decided, and to offer some little variation on the subject, "that
19James's gig will break down?" "Break down! oh, lord! did you ever see such a little tittuppy thing in your life? There
20is not a sound piece of iron about it. The wheels have been fairly worn out these ten years at least--and as for the
21body! upon my soul, you might shake it to pieces yourself with a touch. It is the most devilish little rickety business
22I ever beheld! thank God! we have got a better. I would not be bound to go two miles in it for fifty thousand pounds."
23"Good heavens!" cried Catherine, quite frightened. "Then pray let us turn back; they will certainly meet with an
24accident if we go on. Do let us turn back, Mr. Thorpe; stop and speak to my brother, and tell him how very unsafe it
25is." "Unsafe! oh, lord! what is there in that? They will only get a roll if it does break down; and there is plenty of
26dirt; it will be excellent falling. Oh, curse it! the carriage is safe enough, if a man knows how to drive it; a thing
27of that sort in good hands will last above twenty years after it is fairly worn out. Lord bless you! i would undertake
28for five pounds to drive it to York and back again, without losing a nail." Catherine listened with astonishment; she
29knew not how to reconcile two such very different accounts of the same thing; for she had not been brought up to
30understand the propensities of a rattle, nor to know to how many idle assertions and impudent falsehoods the excess of
31vanity will lead. Her own family were plain, matter-of-fact people who seldom aimed at wit of any kind; her father, at
32the utmost, being contented with a pun, and her mother with a proverb; they were not in the habit therefore of telling
33lies to increase their importance, or of asserting at one moment what they would contradict the next. She reflected on
34the affair for some time in much perplexity, and was more than once on the point of requesting from Mr. Thorpe a clearer
35insight into his real opinion on the subject; but she checked herself, because it appeared to her that he did not excel
36in giving those clearer insights, in making those things plain which he had before made ambiguous; and, joining to this,
37the consideration that he would not really suffer his sister and his friend to be exposed to a danger from which he
38might easily preserve them, she concluded at last that he must know the carriage to be in fact perfectly safe, and
39therefore would alarm herself no longer. By him the whole matter seemed entirely forgotten; and all the rest of his
40conversation, or rather talk, began and ended with himself and his own concerns. He told her of horses which he had
41bought for a trifle and sold for incredible sums; of racing matches, in which his judgment had infallibly foretold the
42winner; of shooting parties, in which he had killed more birds (though without having one good shot) than all his
43companions together; and described to her some famous day's sport, with the fox-hounds, in which his foresight and skill
44in directing the dogs had repaired the mistakes of the most experienced huntsman, and in which the boldness of his
45riding, though it had never endangered his own life for a moment, had been constantly leading others into difficulties,
46which he calmly concluded had broken the necks of many. Little as Catherine was in the habit of judging for herself, and
47unfixed as were her general notions of what men ought to be, she could not entirely repress a doubt, while she bore with
48the effusions of his endless conceit, of his being altogether completely agreeable. It was a bold surmise, for he was
49Isabella's brother; and she had been assured by James that his manners would recommend him to all her sex; but in spite
50of this, the extreme weariness of his company, which crept over her before they had been out an hour, and which
51continued unceasingly to increase till they stopped in Pulteney Street again, induced her, in some small degree, to
52resist such high authority, and to distrust his powers of giving universal pleasure. When they arrived at Mrs. Allen's
53door, the astonishment of Isabella was hardly to be expressed, on finding that it was too late in the day for them to
54attend her friend into the house: "Past three o'clock!" It was inconceivable, incredible, impossible! and she would
55neither believe her own watch, nor her brother's, nor the servant's; she would believe no assurance of it founded on
56reason or reality, till Morland produced his watch, and ascertained the fact; to have doubted a moment longer then,
57would have been equally inconceivable, incredible, and impossible; and she could only protest, over and over again, that
58no two hours and a half had ever gone off so swiftly before, as Catherine was called on to confirm; Catherine could not
59tell a falsehood even to please Isabella; but the latter was spared the misery of her friend's dissenting voice, by not
60waiting for her answer. Her own feelings entirely engrossed her; her wretchedness was most acute on finding herself
61obliged to go directly home. It was ages since she had had a moment's conversation with her dearest Catherine; and,
62though she had such thousands of things to say to her, it appeared as if they were never to be together again; so, with
63smiles of most exquisite misery, and the laughing eye of utter despondency, she bade her friend adieu and went on.
64Catherine found Mrs. Allen just returned from all the busy idleness of the morning, and was immediately greeted with,
65"Well, my dear, here you are," a truth which she had no greater inclination than power to dispute; "and I hope you have
66had a pleasant airing?" "Yes, ma'am, I thank you; we could not have had a nicer day." "So Mrs. Thorpe said; she was
67vastly pleased at your all going." "You have seen Mrs. Thorpe, then?" "Yes, I went to the pump-room as soon as you were
68gone, and there I met her, and we had a great deal of talk together. She says there was hardly any veal to be got at
69market this morning, it is so uncommonly scarce." "Did you see anybody else of our acquaintance?" "Yes; we agreed to
70take a turn in the Crescent, and there we met Mrs. Hughes, and Mr. and Miss Tilney walking with her." "Did you indeed?
71And did they speak to you?"
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