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1The hair was curled, and the maid sent away, and Emma sat down to think and be miserable.--It was a wretched business
2indeed!--Such an overthrow of every thing she had been wishing for!--Such a development of every thing most
3unwelcome!--Such a blow for Harriet!--that was the worst of all. Every part of it brought pain and humiliation, of some
4sort or other; but, compared with the evil to Harriet, all was light; and she would gladly have submitted to feel yet
5more mistaken--more in error--more disgraced by mis-judgment, than she actually was, could the effects of her blunders
6have been confined to herself. "If I had not persuaded Harriet into liking the man, I could have borne any thing. He
7might have doubled his presumption to me--but poor Harriet!" How she could have been so deceived!--He protested that he
8had never thought seriously of Harriet--never! She looked back as well as she could; but it was all confusion. She had
9taken up the idea, she supposed, and made every thing bend to it. His manners, however, must have been unmarked,
10wavering, dubious, or she could not have been so misled. The picture!--How eager he had been about the picture!--and the
11charade!--and an hundred other circumstances;--how clearly they had seemed to point at Harriet. To be sure, the charade,
12with its "ready wit"--but then the "soft eyes"--in fact it suited neither; it was a jumble without taste or truth. Who
13could have seen through such thick-headed nonsense? Certainly she had often, especially of late, thought his manners to
14herself unnecessarily gallant; but it had passed as his way, as a mere error of judgment, of knowledge, of taste, as one
15proof among others that he had not always lived in the best society, that with all the gentleness of his address, true
16elegance was sometimes wanting; but, till this very day, she had never, for an instant, suspected it to mean any thing
17but grateful respect to her as Harriet's friend. To Mr. John Knightley was she indebted for her first idea on the
18subject, for the first start of its possibility. There was no denying that those brothers had penetration. She
19remembered what Mr. Knightley had once said to her about Mr. Elton, the caution he had given, the conviction he had
20professed that Mr. Elton would never marry indiscreetly; and blushed to think how much truer a knowledge of his
21character had been there shewn than any she had reached herself. It was dreadfully mortifying; but Mr. Elton was proving
22himself, in many respects, the very reverse of what she had meant and believed him; proud, assuming, conceited; very
23full of his own claims, and little concerned about the feelings of others. Contrary to the usual course of things, Mr.
24Elton's wanting to pay his addresses to her had sunk him in her opinion. His professions and his proposals did him no
25service. She thought nothing of his attachment, and was insulted by his hopes. He wanted to marry well, and having the
26arrogance to raise his eyes to her, pretended to be in love; but she was perfectly easy as to his not suffering any
27disappointment that need be cared for. There had been no real affection either in his language or manners. Sighs and
28fine words had been given in abundance; but she could hardly devise any set of expressions, or fancy any tone of voice,
29less allied with real love. She need not trouble herself to pity him. He only wanted to aggrandise and enrich himself;
30and if Miss Woodhouse of Hartfield, the heiress of thirty thousand pounds, were not quite so easily obtained as he had
31fancied, he would soon try for Miss Somebody else with twenty, or with ten. But--that he should talk of encouragement,
32should consider her as aware of his views, accepting his attentions, meaning (in short), to marry him!--should suppose
33himself her equal in connexion or mind!--look down upon her friend, so well understanding the gradations of rank below
34him, and be so blind to what rose above, as to fancy himself shewing no presumption in addressing her!--It was most
35provoking. Perhaps it was not fair to expect him to feel how very much he was her inferior in talent, and all the
36elegancies of mind. The very want of such equality might prevent his perception of it; but he must know that in fortune
37and consequence she was greatly his superior. He must know that the Woodhouses had been settled for several generations
38at Hartfield, the younger branch of a very ancient family--and that the Eltons were nobody. The landed property of
39Hartfield certainly was inconsiderable, being but a sort of notch in the Donwell Abbey estate, to which all the rest of
40Highbury belonged; but their fortune, from other sources, was such as to make them scarcely secondary to Donwell Abbey
41itself, in every other kind of consequence; and the Woodhouses had long held a high place in the consideration of the
42neighbourhood which Mr. Elton had first entered not two years ago, to make his way as he could, without any alliances
43but in trade, or any thing to recommend him to notice but his situation and his civility.--But he had fancied her in
44love with him; that evidently must have been his dependence; and after raving a little about the seeming incongruity of
45gentle manners and a conceited head, Emma was obliged in common honesty to stop and admit that her own behaviour to him
46had been so complaisant and obliging, so full of courtesy and attention, as (supposing her real motive unperceived)
47might warrant a man of ordinary observation and delicacy, like Mr. Elton, in fancying himself a very decided favourite.
48If she had so misinterpreted his feelings, she had little right to wonder that he, with self-interest to blind him,
49should have mistaken hers. The first error and the worst lay at her door. It was foolish, it was wrong, to take so
50active a part in bringing any two people together. It was adventuring too far, assuming too much, making light of what
51ought to be serious, a trick of what ought to be simple. She was quite concerned and ashamed, and resolved to do such
52things no more. "Here have I," said she, "actually talked poor Harriet into being very much attached to this man. She
53might never have thought of him but for me; and certainly never would have thought of him with hope, if I had not
54assured her of his attachment, for she is as modest and humble as I used to think him. Oh! that I had been satisfied
55with persuading her not to accept young Martin. There I was quite right. That was well done of me; but there I should
56have stopped, and left the rest to time and chance. I was introducing her into good company, and giving her the
57opportunity of pleasing some one worth having; I ought not to have attempted more. But now, poor girl, her peace is cut
58up for some time. I have been but half a friend to her; and if she were not to feel this disappointment so very much, I
59am sure I have not an idea of any body else who would be at all desirable for her;--William Coxe--Oh! no, I could not
60endure William Coxe--a pert young lawyer." She stopt to blush and laugh at her own relapse, and then resumed a more
61serious, more dispiriting cogitation upon what had been, and might be, and must be. The distressing explanation she had
62to make to Harriet, and all that poor Harriet would be suffering, with the awkwardness of future meetings, the
63difficulties of continuing or discontinuing the acquaintance, of subduing feelings, concealing resentment, and avoiding
64eclat, were enough to occupy her in most unmirthful reflections some time longer, and she went to bed at last with
65nothing settled but the conviction of her having blundered most dreadfully. To youth and natural cheerfulness like
66Emma's, though under temporary gloom at night, the return of day will hardly fail to bring return of spirits. The youth
67and cheerfulness of morning are in happy analogy, and of powerful operation; and if the distress be not poignant enough
68to keep the eyes unclosed, they will be sure to open to sensations of softened pain and brighter hope. Emma got up on
69the morrow more disposed for comfort than she had gone to bed, more ready to see alleviations of the evil before her,
70and to depend on getting tolerably out of it.
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