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1Mrs. Jennings, Lady Middleton's mother, was a good-humoured, merry, fat, elderly woman, who talked a great deal, seemed
2very happy, and rather vulgar. She was full of jokes and laughter, and before dinner was over had said many witty things
3on the subject of lovers and husbands; hoped they had not left their hearts behind them in Sussex, and pretended to see
4them blush whether they did or not. Marianne was vexed at it for her sister's sake, and turned her eyes towards Elinor
5to see how she bore these attacks, with an earnestness which gave Elinor far more pain than could arise from such
6common-place raillery as Mrs. Jennings's. Colonel Brandon, the friend of Sir John, seemed no more adapted by resemblance
7of manner to be his friend, than Lady Middleton was to be his wife, or Mrs. Jennings to be Lady Middleton's mother. He
8was silent and grave. His appearance however was not unpleasing, in spite of his being in the opinion of Marianne and
9Margaret an absolute old bachelor, for he was on the wrong side of five and thirty; but though his face was not
10handsome, his countenance was sensible, and his address was particularly gentlemanlike. There was nothing in any of the
11party which could recommend them as companions to the Dashwoods; but the cold insipidity of Lady Middleton was so
12particularly repulsive, that in comparison of it the gravity of Colonel Brandon, and even the boisterous mirth of Sir
13John and his mother-in-law was interesting. Lady Middleton seemed to be roused to enjoyment only by the entrance of her
14four noisy children after dinner, who pulled her about, tore her clothes, and put an end to every kind of discourse
15except what related to themselves. In the evening, as Marianne was discovered to be musical, she was invited to play.
16The instrument was unlocked, every body prepared to be charmed, and Marianne, who sang very well, at their request went
17through the chief of the songs which Lady Middleton had brought into the family on her marriage, and which perhaps had
18lain ever since in the same position on the pianoforte, for her ladyship had celebrated that event by giving up music,
19although by her mother's account, she had played extremely well, and by her own was very fond of it. Marianne's
20performance was highly applauded. Sir John was loud in his admiration at the end of every song, and as loud in his
21conversation with the others while every song lasted. Lady Middleton frequently called him to order, wondered how any
22one's attention could be diverted from music for a moment, and asked Marianne to sing a particular song which Marianne
23had just finished. Colonel Brandon alone, of all the party, heard her without being in raptures. He paid her only the
24compliment of attention; and she felt a respect for him on the occasion, which the others had reasonably forfeited by
25their shameless want of taste. His pleasure in music, though it amounted not to that ecstatic delight which alone could
26sympathize with her own, was estimable when contrasted against the horrible insensibility of the others; and she was
27reasonable enough to allow that a man of five and thirty might well have outlived all acuteness of feeling and every
28exquisite power of enjoyment. She was perfectly disposed to make every allowance for the colonel's advanced state of
29life which humanity required. CHAPTER VIII. Mrs. Jennings was a widow with an ample jointure. She had only two
30daughters, both of whom she had lived to see respectably married, and she had now therefore nothing to do but to marry
31all the rest of the world. In the promotion of this object she was zealously active, as far as her ability reached; and
32missed no opportunity of projecting weddings among all the young people of her acquaintance. She was remarkably quick in
33the discovery of attachments, and had enjoyed the advantage of raising the blushes and the vanity of many a young lady
34by insinuations of her power over such a young man; and this kind of discernment enabled her soon after her arrival at
35Barton decisively to pronounce that Colonel Brandon was very much in love with Marianne Dashwood. She rather suspected
36it to be so, on the very first evening of their being together, from his listening so attentively while she sang to
37them; and when the visit was returned by the Middletons' dining at the cottage, the fact was ascertained by his
38listening to her again. It must be so. She was perfectly convinced of it. It would be an excellent match, for he was
39rich, and she was handsome. Mrs. Jennings had been anxious to see Colonel Brandon well married, ever since her
40connection with Sir John first brought him to her knowledge; and she was always anxious to get a good husband for every
41pretty girl. The immediate advantage to herself was by no means inconsiderable, for it supplied her with endless jokes
42against them both. At the park she laughed at the colonel, and in the cottage at Marianne. To the former her raillery
43was probably, as far as it regarded only himself, perfectly indifferent; but to the latter it was at first
44incomprehensible; and when its object was understood, she hardly knew whether most to laugh at its absurdity, or censure
45its impertinence, for she considered it as an unfeeling reflection on the colonel's advanced years, and on his forlorn
46condition as an old bachelor. Mrs. Dashwood, who could not think a man five years younger than herself, so exceedingly
47ancient as he appeared to the youthful fancy of her daughter, ventured to clear Mrs. Jennings from the probability of
48wishing to throw ridicule on his age. "But at least, Mama, you cannot deny the absurdity of the accusation, though you
49may not think it intentionally ill-natured. Colonel Brandon is certainly younger than Mrs. Jennings, but he is old
50enough to be my father; and if he were ever animated enough to be in love, must have long outlived every sensation of
51the kind. It is too ridiculous! When is a man to be safe from such wit, if age and infirmity will not protect him?"
52"Infirmity!" said Elinor, "do you call Colonel Brandon infirm? I can easily suppose that his age may appear much greater
53to you than to my mother; but you can hardly deceive yourself as to his having the use of his limbs!" "Did not you hear
54him complain of the rheumatism? and is not that the commonest infirmity of declining life?" "My dearest child," said her
55mother, laughing, "at this rate you must be in continual terror of my decay; and it must seem to you a miracle that my
56life has been extended to the advanced age of forty." "Mama, you are not doing me justice. I know very well that Colonel
57Brandon is not old enough to make his friends yet apprehensive of losing him in the course of nature. He may live twenty
58years longer. But thirty-five has nothing to do with matrimony." "Perhaps," said Elinor, "thirty-five and seventeen had
59better not have any thing to do with matrimony together. But if there should by any chance happen to be a woman who is
60single at seven and twenty, I should not think Colonel Brandon's being thirty-five any objection to his marrying her."
61"A woman of seven and twenty," said Marianne, after pausing a moment, "can never hope to feel or inspire affection
62again, and if her home be uncomfortable, or her fortune small, I can suppose that she might bring herself to submit to
63the offices of a nurse, for the sake of the provision and security of a wife. In his marrying such a woman therefore
64there would be nothing unsuitable. It would be a compact of convenience, and the world would be satisfied. In my eyes it
65would be no marriage at all, but that would be nothing. To me it would seem only a commercial exchange, in which each
66wished to be benefited at the expense of the other." "It would be impossible, I know," replied Elinor, "to convince you
67that a woman of seven and twenty could feel for a man of thirty-five anything near enough to love, to make him a
68desirable companion to her. But I must object to your dooming Colonel Brandon and his wife to the constant confinement
69of a sick chamber, merely because he chanced to complain yesterday (a very cold damp day) of a slight rheumatic feel in
70one of his shoulders." "But he talked of flannel waistcoats," said Marianne; "and with me a flannel waistcoat is
71invariably connected with aches, cramps, rheumatisms, and every species of ailment that can afflict the old and the
72feeble."
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