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1Her influence, or at least the consciousness and use of it, originated in an act of kindness by Susan, which, after many
2hesitations of delicacy, she at last worked herself up to. It had very early occurred to her that a small sum of money
3might, perhaps, restore peace for ever on the sore subject of the silver knife, canvassed as it now was continually, and
4the riches which she was in possession of herself, her uncle having given her £10 at parting, made her as able as she
5was willing to be generous. But she was so wholly unused to confer favours, except on the very poor, so unpractised in
6removing evils, or bestowing kindnesses among her equals, and so fearful of appearing to elevate herself as a great lady
7at home, that it took some time to determine that it would not be unbecoming in her to make such a present. It was made,
8however, at last: a silver knife was bought for Betsey, and accepted with great delight, its newness giving it every
9advantage over the other that could be desired; Susan was established in the full possession of her own, Betsey
10handsomely declaring that now she had got one so much prettier herself, she should never want that again; and no
11reproach seemed conveyed to the equally satisfied mother, which Fanny had almost feared to be impossible. The deed
12thoroughly answered: a source of domestic altercation was entirely done away, and it was the means of opening Susan's
13heart to her, and giving her something more to love and be interested in. Susan shewed that she had delicacy: pleased as
14she was to be mistress of property which she had been struggling for at least two years, she yet feared that her
15sister's judgment had been against her, and that a reproof was designed her for having so struggled as to make the
16purchase necessary for the tranquillity of the house. Her temper was open. She acknowledged her fears, blamed herself
17for having contended so warmly; and from that hour Fanny, understanding the worth of her disposition and perceiving how
18fully she was inclined to seek her good opinion and refer to her judgment, began to feel again the blessing of
19affection, and to entertain the hope of being useful to a mind so much in need of help, and so much deserving it. She
20gave advice, advice too sound to be resisted by a good understanding, and given so mildly and considerately as not to
21irritate an imperfect temper, and she had the happiness of observing its good effects not unfrequently. More was not
22expected by one who, while seeing all the obligation and expediency of submission and forbearance, saw also with
23sympathetic acuteness of feeling all that must be hourly grating to a girl like Susan. Her greatest wonder on the
24subject soon became--not that Susan should have been provoked into disrespect and impatience against her better
25knowledge--but that so much better knowledge, so many good notions should have been hers at all; and that, brought up in
26the midst of negligence and error, she should have formed such proper opinions of what ought to be; she, who had had no
27cousin Edmund to direct her thoughts or fix her principles. The intimacy thus begun between them was a material
28advantage to each. By sitting together upstairs, they avoided a great deal of the disturbance of the house; Fanny had
29peace, and Susan learned to think it no misfortune to be quietly employed. They sat without a fire; but that was a
30privation familiar even to Fanny, and she suffered the less because reminded by it of the East room. It was the only
31point of resemblance. In space, light, furniture, and prospect, there was nothing alike in the two apartments; and she
32often heaved a sigh at the remembrance of all her books and boxes, and various comforts there. By degrees the girls came
33to spend the chief of the morning upstairs, at first only in working and talking, but after a few days, the remembrance
34of the said books grew so potent and stimulative that Fanny found it impossible not to try for books again. There were
35none in her father's house; but wealth is luxurious and daring, and some of hers found its way to a circulating library.
36She became a subscriber; amazed at being anything in propria persona, amazed at her own doings in every way, to be a
37renter, a chuser of books! And to be having any one's improvement in view in her choice! But so it was. Susan had read
38nothing, and Fanny longed to give her a share in her own first pleasures, and inspire a taste for the biography and
39poetry which she delighted in herself. In this occupation she hoped, moreover, to bury some of the recollections of
40Mansfield, which were too apt to seize her mind if her fingers only were busy; and, especially at this time, hoped it
41might be useful in diverting her thoughts from pursuing Edmund to London, whither, on the authority of her aunt's last
42letter, she knew he was gone. She had no doubt of what would ensue. The promised notification was hanging over her head.
43The postman's knock within the neighbourhood was beginning to bring its daily terrors, and if reading could banish the
44idea for even half an hour, it was something gained.
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