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1"Oh, no! Mason will not defy me; nor, knowing it, will he hurt me--but, unintentionally, he might in a moment, by one
2careless word, deprive me, if not of life, yet for ever of happiness." "Tell him to be cautious, sir: let him know what
3you fear, and show him how to avert the danger." He laughed sardonically, hastily took my hand, and as hastily threw it
4from him. "If I could do that, simpleton, where would the danger be? Annihilated in a moment. Ever since I have known
5Mason, I have only had to say to him 'Do that,' and the thing has been done. But I cannot give him orders in this case:
6I cannot say 'Beware of harming me, Richard;' for it is imperative that I should keep him ignorant that harm to me is
7possible. Now you look puzzled; and I will puzzle you further. You are my little friend, are you not?" "I like to serve
8you, sir, and to obey you in all that is right." "Precisely: I see you do. I see genuine contentment in your gait and
9mien, your eye and face, when you are helping me and pleasing me--working for me, and with me, in, as you
10characteristically say, 'all that is right:' for if I bid you do what you thought wrong, there would be no light-footed
11running, no neat-handed alacrity, no lively glance and animated complexion. My friend would then turn to me, quiet and
12pale, and would say, 'No, sir; that is impossible: I cannot do it, because it is wrong;' and would become immutable as a
13fixed star. Well, you too have power over me, and may injure me: yet I dare not show you where I am vulnerable, lest,
14faithful and friendly as you are, you should transfix me at once." "If you have no more to fear from Mr. Mason than you
15have from me, sir, you are very safe." "God grant it may be so! Here, Jane, is an arbour; sit down." The arbour was an
16arch in the wall, lined with ivy; it contained a rustic seat. Mr. Rochester took it, leaving room, however, for me: but
17I stood before him. "Sit," he said; "the bench is long enough for two. You don't hesitate to take a place at my side, do
18you? Is that wrong, Jane?" I answered him by assuming it: to refuse would, I felt, have been unwise. "Now, my little
19friend, while the sun drinks the dew--while all the flowers in this old garden awake and expand, and the birds fetch
20their young ones' breakfast out of the Thornfield, and the early bees do their first spell of work--I'll put a case to
21you, which you must endeavour to suppose your own: but first, look at me, and tell me you are at ease, and not fearing
22that I err in detaining you, or that you err in staying." "No, sir; I am content." "Well then, Jane, call to aid your
23fancy:--suppose you were no longer a girl well reared and disciplined, but a wild boy indulged from childhood upwards;
24imagine yourself in a remote foreign land; conceive that you there commit a capital error, no matter of what nature or
25from what motives, but one whose consequences must follow you through life and taint all your existence. Mind, I don't
26say a crime; I am not speaking of shedding of blood or any other guilty act, which might make the perpetrator amenable
27to the law: my word is error. The results of what you have done become in time to you utterly insupportable; you take
28measures to obtain relief: unusual measures, but neither unlawful nor culpable. Still you are miserable; for hope has
29quitted you on the very confines of life: your sun at noon darkens in an eclipse, which you feel will not leave it till
30the time of setting. Bitter and base associations have become the sole food of your memory: you wander here and there,
31seeking rest in exile: happiness in pleasure--I mean in heartless, sensual pleasure--such as dulls intellect and blights
32feeling. Heart-weary and soul-withered, you come home after years of voluntary banishment: you make a new
33acquaintance--how or where no matter: you find in this stranger much of the good and bright qualities which you have
34sought for twenty years, and never before encountered; and they are all fresh, healthy, without soil and without taint.
35Such society revives, regenerates: you feel better days come back--higher wishes, purer feelings; you desire to
36recommence your life, and to spend what remains to you of days in a way more worthy of an immortal being. To attain this
37end, are you justified in overleaping an obstacle of custom--a mere conventional impediment which neither your
38conscience sanctifies nor your judgment approves?" He paused for an answer: and what was I to say? Oh, for some good
39spirit to suggest a judicious and satisfactory response! Vain aspiration! The west wind whispered in the ivy round me;
40but no gentle Ariel borrowed its breath as a medium of speech: the birds sang in the tree-tops; but their song, however
41sweet, was inarticulate. Again Mr. Rochester propounded his query: "Is the wandering and sinful, but now rest-seeking
42and repentant, man justified in daring the world's opinion, in order to attach to him for ever this gentle, gracious,
43genial stranger, thereby securing his own peace of mind and regeneration of life?" "Sir," I answered, "a wanderer's
44repose or a sinner's reformation should never depend on a fellow-creature. Men and women die; philosophers falter in
45wisdom, and Christians in goodness: if any one you know has suffered and erred, let him look higher than his equals for
46strength to amend and solace to heal." "But the instrument--the instrument! God, who does the work, ordains the
47instrument. I have myself--I tell it you without parable--been a worldly, dissipated, restless man; and I believe I have
48found the instrument for my cure in--" He paused: the birds went on carolling, the leaves lightly rustling. I almost
49wondered they did not check their songs and whispers to catch the suspended revelation; but they would have had to wait
50many minutes--so long was the silence protracted. At last I looked up at the tardy speaker: he was looking eagerly at
51me. "Little friend," said he, in quite a changed tone--while his face changed too, losing all its softness and gravity,
52and becoming harsh and sarcastic--"you have noticed my tender penchant for Miss Ingram: don't you think if I married her
53she would regenerate me with a vengeance?" He got up instantly, went quite to the other end of the walk, and when he
54came back he was humming a tune. "Jane, Jane," said he, stopping before me, "you are quite pale with your vigils: don't
55you curse me for disturbing your rest?" "Curse you? No, sir." "Shake hands in confirmation of the word. What cold
56fingers! They were warmer last night when I touched them at the door of the mysterious chamber. Jane, when will you
57watch with me again?" "Whenever I can be useful, sir." "For instance, the night before I am married! I am sure I shall
58not be able to sleep. Will you promise to sit up with me to bear me company? To you I can talk of my lovely one: for now
59you have seen her and know her." "Yes, sir." "She's a rare one, is she not, Jane?" "Yes, sir." "A strapper--a real
60strapper, Jane: big, brown, and buxom; with hair just such as the ladies of Carthage must have had. Bless me! there's
61Dent and Lynn in the stables! Go in by the shrubbery, through that wicket." As I went one way, he went another, and I
62heard him in the yard, saying cheerfully-- "Mason got the start of you all this morning; he was gone before sunrise: I
63rose at four to see him off."
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