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1Well, the old man went on asking questions till he just fairly emptied that young fellow. Blamed if he didn't inquire
2about everybody and everything in that blessed town, and all about the Wilkses; and about Peter's business--which was a
3tanner; and about George's--which was a carpenter; and about Harvey's--which was a dissentering minister; and so on, and
4so on. Then he says: "What did you want to walk all the way up to the steamboat for?" "Because she's a big Orleans boat,
5and I was afeard she mightn't stop there. When they're deep they won't stop for a hail. A Cincinnati boat will, but this
6is a St. Louis one." "Was Peter Wilks well off?" "Oh, yes, pretty well off. He had houses and land, and it's reckoned he
7left three or four thousand in cash hid up som'ers." "When did you say he died?" "I didn't say, but it was last night."
8"Funeral to-morrow, likely?" "Yes, 'bout the middle of the day." "Well, it's all terrible sad; but we've all got to go,
9one time or another. So what we want to do is to be prepared; then we're all right." "Yes, sir, it's the best way. Ma
10used to always say that." When we struck the boat she was about done loading, and pretty soon she got off. The king
11never said nothing about going aboard, so I lost my ride, after all. When the boat was gone the king made me paddle up
12another mile to a lonesome place, and then he got ashore and says: "Now hustle back, right off, and fetch the duke up
13here, and the new carpet-bags. And if he's gone over to t'other side, go over there and git him. And tell him to git
14himself up regardless. Shove along, now." I see what he was up to; but I never said nothing, of course. When I got back
15with the duke we hid the canoe, and then they set down on a log, and the king told him everything, just like the young
16fellow had said it--every last word of it. And all the time he was a-doing it he tried to talk like an Englishman; and
17he done it pretty well, too, for a slouch. I can't imitate him, and so I ain't a-going to try to; but he really done it
18pretty good. Then he says: "How are you on the deef and dumb, Bilgewater?" The duke said, leave him alone for that; said
19he had played a deef and dumb person on the histronic boards. So then they waited for a steamboat. About the middle of
20the afternoon a couple of little boats come along, but they didn't come from high enough up the river; but at last there
21was a big one, and they hailed her. She sent out her yawl, and we went aboard, and she was from Cincinnati; and when
22they found we only wanted to go four or five mile they was booming mad, and gave us a cussing, and said they wouldn't
23land us. But the king was ca'm. He says: "If gentlemen kin afford to pay a dollar a mile apiece to be took on and put
24off in a yawl, a steamboat kin afford to carry 'em, can't it?" So they softened down and said it was all right; and when
25we got to the village they yawled us ashore. About two dozen men flocked down when they see the yawl a-coming, and when
26the king says: "Kin any of you gentlemen tell me wher' Mr. Peter Wilks lives?" they give a glance at one another, and
27nodded their heads, as much as to say, "What d' I tell you?" Then one of them says, kind of soft and gentle: "I'm sorry
28sir, but the best we can do is to tell you where he did live yesterday evening." Sudden as winking the ornery old cretur
29went all to smash, and fell up against the man, and put his chin on his shoulder, and cried down his back, and says:
30"Alas, alas, our poor brother--gone, and we never got to see him; oh, it's too, too hard!" Then he turns around,
31blubbering, and makes a lot of idiotic signs to the duke on his hands, and blamed if he didn't drop a carpet-bag and
32bust out a-crying. If they warn't the beatenest lot, them two frauds, that ever I struck. Well, the men gathered around
33and sympathized with them, and said all sorts of kind things to them, and carried their carpet-bags up the hill for
34them, and let them lean on them and cry, and told the king all about his brother's last moments, and the king he told it
35all over again on his hands to the duke, and both of them took on about that dead tanner like they'd lost the twelve
36disciples. Well, if ever I struck anything like it, I'm a nigger. It was enough to make a body ashamed of the human
37race.
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